Why do some white girls like black guys?: Dating and Relationships
9:55 AM
Some girls like black guys for the utterly shocking reasons that they like any other guys: because they're hot, or awesome, or funny, or kind, or none of those things but still somehow alluring. Because they're good in bed, or good with a fishing rod, or good at driving the rest of the way when you're tired. Maybe because they have that kind of nature that always seems ready to laugh about it, or maybe they're kinda serious, in that reassuring way they lets you know they've got your back. It could be how fun it is to jog around the lake together, or maybe they just have a really cool dog that is at least half the allure. Maybe they'd be an incredible dad, or business partner, or the grits at their food truck were what won you over.
I think some people love to hypothesize everything when sometimes you just cannot fully explain nature. To even attempt to provide a reason means you must believe that the behavior is counter normal. Otherwise, why would you need to explain it? Sometimes, there is a reason, sometimes it's just natural/physical/sexual/i
I have, always had, both a normal attraction to Black Men which was formed by growing up alongside and playing with mostly black children when I was young AND an extra-normal attraction to Black Men that may be partially caused by an incestuous rape when I was a child by a white uncle which did three things - (1) made me afraid of white men, and (2) made me prematurely aware of my sexuality and of sexual situations between men and women at an early age, and (3) being surrounded by mostly black boys my age who were interested in sex.
My normal attraction was simply that I was a female child being raised in a predominantly African American neighborhood that played with black children and accepted them as the same as myself. So, when sex entered my minds eye at too early an age, it was black boys that were available, abundant, interested, and attractive. I just simply experienced the same "boy-crazy" phase that most girls experience except that I was naturally interested in the boys that I lived with and played with.
In school, I did meet white boys and Hispanic boys too, and I very innocently became interested in them too. That said, as I got older, I began to realize that the ghosts of my past were unfairly causing me to retreat from white guys and I found that I could never really feel all that comfortable or safe. The girls reading this probably already know what that means...yes, orgasm was out of the question. It's taken me quite a long time to come to terms with what happened to me and how that has contributed to the woman I have become. I'm not saying I will never date another white guy because you never know what happens in life but I haven't dated a white guy in four years.
I've gone through several stages of my sexuality from fear, infatuation, curiosity, and obsession to self-objectification, exploitation, fixation and manipulation. Ultimately we all figure out who we are and what makes us happy. I don't believe it's all that scientific. Black Men are many times representative of the perfect body type for men which catch the eyes of women regardless of whether they would ever date one or not; Black Men typically exude confidence, earned or not, and personify the personality traits that women most often find to be representative of the perfect man; Black Men never fail to compliment any woman in their sight and will honor her with a look, gesture or sentence that lets her know he is more interested in her than a ride to the store; Black Men are known, earned or not, to be fantastic lovers which intrigues the average woman; and, Black Men will break down a woman's defenses by asking straight up for sex.
All these things, as well as relaxed cultural taboo's of interracial relationships and pop-culture influences that promote racial harmony, contribute to an increased interest in Black Men by white women. I think white women have always been naturally attracted to Black Men but societal norms and mores unfairly confined marriage and sex to those who shared the same ethnic background. Only the particularly brave ventured into the land of interracial mixing unless it was by force from a slave owner. Even then, there are documented stories of white wives of slave owners who voluntarily and perhaps eagerly crossed those boundaries secretly.
Women are women and men are men - for the most part. Men spend their young lives trying to stick things into women and women spend their young lives trying to find men to stick things into them. It's a part of human nature. Some of us go a little further than the rest of us but for the most part we are all victims of the same procreatal drives and motivations. As far as I've experienced, the actual "thing" that sticks and the "things" that get stuck are identically designed with the exception of skin tone and a few minor details specific to the person.
So, aside from rebellion, taboo, rape, perversion, or other psychological factors that would cause a women to fixate her sexual perspectives on any number of extra-normal groups; the motivations for interracial sex are plentiful if you look for them. It doesn't have to be extra-normal, it doesn't have to be "alternative". It's just a man and a women having sex and loving each other. A round peg in a round hole, just as God intended.
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