A Quick and Dirty Dating Guide to Foreign Girls
10:03 AM
Not knowing the distinguishing traits of whatever foreign girl a guy is trying to pick up won’t kill his chances with her because the fundamentals of game are universal, handed down from the cosmos like the ten commandments of poon*. The tried and true methods will work regardless of her country of origin. Nonetheless, knowledge of her ethnic idiosyncrasies will put a man way ahead of his competition.
The one structural advantage any guy has with foreign girls, namely the allure of the exotic (hybrid vigor for you science wonks), is not something that can be learned. I assume it counts for some fraction of my interactions with them, but since most of the foreigners I met were in the US at the time and surrounded by “exotic” American men I don’t think that advantage played much role.
The following observations are based on the foreign girls I have been with for more than a one night stand. All of them were recent (less than one year) emigres. Feel free to extend these gross generalizations to the entire ethnic group.
Russian – I have a thing for Russian chicks and Eastern European chicks in general. Their apple faces and chiclet teeth make my loins sing. The toughest part of gaming them occurs right at the beginning, getting progressively easier once the front line defenses are breached. They are a challenge to approach because they compose themselves with an icy aloofness that tells a guy he will get his balls handed to him if he dares interrupt her calculated repose with a “hi”. Once opened, the Russian chick will shit test you like there’s no tomorrow. Her barrage of caustic rudeness will shock you and leave lesser men reeling. This defensive mechanism has been honed from a lifetime of dealing with Russian men who went caveman on her with direct game. The important thing to keep in mind is that her initial flurry of verbal blows is a paper tiger.
Successfully parry her and you’ll notice her eyes immediately light up with attraction. Underneath the chilly exterior she harbors an uncontrollable desire to submit to a worthy man. If you are that man, she’ll transform from bitchy ice queen to sultry seductress in a flash. Sex with them will be like nothing you’ve ever experienced with an American woman. They are ravenous in the sack and love to be dominated.
Their submissive posturing and obvious delight at servicing your sexual perversions needs will make you feel like a man who missed the memo on the feminist revolution. When she gives knob jobs, which is often, you will sense right away that she enjoys every minute of it and is not just doing it out of obligation — your dick may as well be a vodka popsicle. Don’t be surprised if she sweetly asks you if you’d like to do her in the ass the first time you make love with her. There is only one answer to that question. Caveats: Get to them before they hit 30; after 30 it’s instant babushka. Also, Russians are incredibly manipulative. They can smell fear upwind. If she is able to get to your soft underbelly, she’ll rip you open. Don’t ever show weakness or let her know she’s won you over. An old Russian proverb says: Once a woman captures a man’s heart, she loses interest. This is doubly true for Russian women.
Polish – The second most warm-hearted, selfless, and charming girl I have ever been with was a Polish girl who, unbeknownst to me until the last days of our fling, happened to be married. Which shows that even angels with a heart of gold are capable of infidelity. Contrary to the ethnic jokes, Polish girls are not stupid. They are sharp and funny and hopelessly romantic. Yes, Polish girls are more romantic than even French or Italian girls. Their romantic idealism is not as stylistic as the French nor as passionate as the Italians, but it goes deeper and they feel it more strongly. If you recite a poem you wrote to a Polish girl on a date, she will love you for it without a hint of cynicism. They are less materialistic than most and that is reflected in their strong connection to nature and the supernatural. You will get more mileage out of watching a sunset with her than with any other type of girl. A Polish girl will fall in love with you the second your dick grazes her labia. Most Polish girls are naturally thin — they don’t exercise much but they don’t eat much either.
Czech – These are the new “it” girls of Europe. They are all unconventionally hot. Czech porn is bookmarked in my browser. Czech girls love buying you things and they relish the sappy romantic phase of courtship. “Let’s take a walk under the moonlight” is a common refrain you’ll hear from her. Czech girls have embraced the feminist dogma of the West yet remain tied to the traditional dating mores of Eastern Europe which makes for a lot of hypocrisy. But that’s OK, because all you need to be is an oak tree for her to lean on through the storm of her emotions. The one Czech girl I was with was average in bed. Clearly, the American sense of entitlement had corrupted her after only a few months in the country.
Estonian – It has been said that the hottest girls in the world hail from Estonia’s capital Tallinn. I believe this is correct. My next trip abroad will be to Estonia. Like other European women, Estonians dress stylishly, are comfortable in their womanly skin, are naturally svelte, and love the company of men. They hate Russians so if you want to win points with her drop a casual anti-Russian remark about how you heard their women drive their men to drink and an early death. Most Estonian women are 9s and 10s with the approachability index of 6s and 7s, so when you find the rare one in the US you absolutely must go for it. They like to wear baby tees that accentuate their ample Baltic bosoms. Estonian women are so beautiful their 40 year olds are more fuckable than America’s 25 year olds. If you are smart, spend the day with your Estonian lover being seen at your favorite pick up spots in the city. When she goes back to her country, she will leave you the parting gift of unbelievable social proof you can cash in for six months of American tail.
French – Fashionable, coquettish, flirtatious, worldly. These stereotypes are accurate. Hairy armpits, anti-American, and loose? Inaccurate. True to their image, French girls love to be seduced as much as they love seducing. Just make sure you know what you’re doing. Heavy-handedness or clumsiness during the pick up will turn her off. Subtlety is key, even if it’s cheesy subtlety. Play hard to get with a French girl; they eat that shit up. Emphasize the “tortured brooding artist” angle a la Ethan Hawke in ‘Great Expectations’. If you have a rudimentary knowledge of black and white photography, offer to take her picture. Nitpick her tiny flaws while you are arranging the shot — “this lighting is bringing out the severity in your nose. here, let’s just move your head this way. perfect!” The French have an inflated sense of self-worth so open a 6 the way you would open a 9. Don’t expect her to fall in love with you just because you penetrated her. Do expect her to have other lovers on the side. If she moves back to France you will never hear from her again.
Finnish – If you think teasing is all part of the fun of flirting, you will not get along with a Finn. Joking banter that arouses an American girl will send a Finn rearing up with indignation at your effrontery. You will be left scratching your head at how someone could be so hypersensitive to your playful humor. I used to call my Finnish girl “finn-skinned”. She almost cried. The upside is that a Finn chick is a naif in the art of head games, so you’ll never have to deal with her flirting with other guys in a bar just to make you jealous. Finns are introverted. There is a sly Finnish joke that goes: How can you tell if you’re talking to an extroverted Finn? He looks at your shoes. But don’t mistake this aversion to sociability for weakness. Remember, these are the people who held off a much larger Soviet invading force. And the best sniper in history was this guy.
A Finn girl’s introversion hides a surprising strength of character. She won’t tolerate her man walking all over her. Fiercely loyal and commitment-oriented, Finns make fantastic girlfriends. More than other women, Finns appreciate small gestures like spontaneously buying her a rocket pop from an ice cream truck. Finn girls smell fantastic and look ten years younger than their age.
Chinese – These girls are sensitive and hold to traditional beliefs about dating and courtship. Seducing them ham-fistedly will backfire. If she is hot, don’t bother with backhanded compliments or other similar tactics designed to put a girl on the defensive about her beauty, as the Chinese girl, like the Finnish girl, will take everything you say at face value. A little game goes a long way with Chinese girls, especially if you are a white guy. They are natural caretakers and will be very supportive of you while you are going through a tough time. While they don’t have a reputation as romantics, they are in fact quite loving and affectionate. They are not as earth-shaking in bed as the Russians, but they can make love for hours on end and have an encyclopedic knowledge of fornication positions. They have a kinky streak. Odds are you’ll get a finger up your ass in the middle of sex. Oh, and it’s true, Chinese girls are very tight and have soft skin like teenage vulva.
Romanian – Romanian girls come from a very tough land, one of the poorest countries in Europe, and this stressful upbringing has molded them into very traditional marriage-minded women. Dating them will be like a time warp to the 1950s. At least, that’s what I’ve heard from friends who have dated them. Unfortunately, the Romanian girl I hooked up with had been in the US for years. It showed. I only include her to demonstrate what a pernicious effect American life has on a foreign woman. Occasionally, I caught glimpses of her former self — the bouyant whimsy, the joie de vive, the optimism, the humbleness. Too bad her soul was slowly getting crushed.
Ukrainian – see Russian if from east Ukraine; Polish if from west ukraine.
So there you have it. Be thankful if you live in a US major metro area. These cities attracts many foreign girls. Once you start dating them, you’ll wonder why you ever bothered with American women. The only downside is getting rusty at dating American girls. When your foreign lover leaves, there will be a difficult period of withdrawal as you adjust to the realities of dating the local scene again and all that it entails – the princess issues, the status whoring, the cellulite, the attention seeking, the bitterness, the neuroses, the strident anti-feminine careerist beyotch militancy. It will be enough to make you want to pack up and leave.
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